When we get married, we aren’t just marrying our spouse. That’s because our spouse usually has a family of their own—parents, siblings, grandparents, and cousins. When we get married, we become a part of that family.
Statistically speaking, married people in the U.S. expect their marriage to do a lot for them individually. We believe marriage should meet most of our relational needs. However, this perspective is a huge problem.
Does the word marriage have too much baggage? It’s a word that means different things to different people. So what if we did an experiment for one week to use a word instead of marriage and see if it changes our perspective for the better.
I’m not sure who said it first, but when I heard this statement years ago, I agreed whole-heartedly: “Sexually, men are like microwaves and women are like crockpots.” Meaning, men are typically ready for sex almost immediately upon hearing the idea. Women enjoy sex, it just takes them a while to warm up to the idea.
Every once in a while, a movie line lands in such a way that sticks with a generation. In the classic movie Jerry Maguire, Tom Cruise’s character proclaims to Renée Zellweger’s character, “You complete me.” I understand why this phrase resonates. It gives a language to what many of us have been taught about marriage—our soul-mate should be able to fix our gaps, cracks, and broken parts.